O LORD, I have heard thy speech, and was afraid: O LORD, revive thy work in the midst of the years, in the midst of the years make known; in wrath remember mercy. (Habakkuk 3:2, KJV)
That small church that I go is receiving a blessing from God that’s oh, so hard to get in this time. Too bad I won’t see it… fully as I want to.
The jovenes are planning to go to a villa in Dorado -a town in northern Puerto Rico- for the weekend. Because I’m going to America, and my mom wouldn’t let me go. The self-pity party has begun. After such a beautiful worship service (or culto, as we say), it’s kinda hard to sink to the reality that there’s a revival that I won’t see.
What’s gonna happen next? I don’t know. God lets man suffer from good and bad so we realize the unpredictability of life (Ecclesiastes 7:14), but this goes way weird. Right now, swine flu’s attacking the island, and we don’t know what’s gonna happen.
Anyways, there’s no way I’m gonna slit my wrists because I’m not gonna be here with them for long. Because I’m not with them, that doesn’t mean that I can’t share with them abroad. What happens if they go to America to a place close where I live? (I’ll pray for that.) What if God lets me do a revival back in Maryland or in DC, New York, or Alaska? If I return back to Puerto Rico, what about that? If I go visit summers? I can still share with them, my friends and brothers in Christ. I can call them, worship with them, and even single them out (kidding, maybe!) while playing and chatting.
Maybe there’s no reason to beat up myself for this. The revival I won’t see can make me see and be part of a whole new one.